Nah, I'm harmless.

And it wouldn't work that well for me, yanno.

"Oh, sorry, site's down, I'll need to meet you to fix it, maybe go for coffee or dinner?"

"Shouldn't you do something on the server? Why should we meet?"

"Huh... The internet... huh... it's clogged. The only solution is for the owner of the site and the programmer to meet and eat and drink together, maybe a movie to try and relax the internet so the issue's fixed."

"Somehow I don't think you're being honest with me."

"Really! I'm a professional and you're not. Everyone knows the internet and computers are strange and magical things. You're lucky it isn't one of those nasty viruses, they require human sacrifices to fix! Would I lie to you?"